The wait is killing me

So a few months after stopping the pill my period went back to being irregular. Last month my period came on day 28 (the app said day 33 it was expected) the month before that my period came on day 31 and the month before that my period came on day 33. So here I am on day 31 with no period so far and I can't get rid of this anxious feeling. It's like I'm just waiting for AF to show up even though I don’t want her too. And because I don't know exactly what day it'll come it's just a waiting game and it's making me crazy. We've been trying for a year, which isn't long compared to others on glow but it is so upsetting every month when af shows and I'm trying to set myself up for that disappointment when really I'm hoping for the exact opposite. How do you ladies deal with the anxious wait?