I am not sure if this is the right place to post, but I am going to anyway because maybe one of you has gone through the same thing.

I am 21 years old and am waiting for a wonderful baby boy with my amazing love. We do not live together yet. Why? Because my parents. My parents are not religious. My parents are just strict. I cannot leave the house unless I get married. And I'm obeying because I have always been the one to listen ti please them.

My boyfriend and I don't have a problem with that. He feels ready to commit to me in marriage, and will do as I want. I want to get married too. But honestly. I feel pressured by my parents, so it makes me not want to. I feel like if I get married, i'm just doing it for them even though i am also doing it for us. But i want to be with him, and have him sleep beside me and him be there whenever i need him because this is so hard, especially now when it is nearly 3am and all I need are his hugs and kisses and i cant have them. Or when I feel our baby kick at 530am and I wish he was here to feel them.

I dont know what to do. I don't want to break their heart, especially my mom's. But i also dont want to get married and feel this pressure and end up not being happy because of it.. My main reason as to why im hesitant to just leave and be happy with him is that i truly believe that my dad will basically disown me and not allow my mom and siblings to contact me. If it weren't for that, i'd have left months ago..

Im so conflicted. I want to do what is best for me, but i dont want to ruin my relationship with my parents, even though i feel like itll ruin my future in a way.

If you have any advice or words for me, i'd appreciate it so much.. Thank you for reading.