Preparing only child?

Question

I have a 4 year old son and am currently 17w with our second. My son doesn't seem to thrilled or happy about the new baby. He's a very sweet boy I just think he doesn't want anyone having his fathers or my attention. I'm quite nervous about how he will adjust to the change. How did you and your SO prepare your only child for the new baby?

Answer

My oldest was 4 when we got pregnant with our second. We read books, watched a show ( Daniel tiger does a great episode about becoming a big brother), and asked him to help with the nursery and pick names etc. We tried to include him as much as possible. We also had serious talks about how the new baby would never take the place of him. Now that new baby is here we try hard to encourage him to help but we also make sure to carve out time for just him and us. He's done great so far.

Answer

My son was 3 years old when we had his brother. He asked about his brother maybe once or twice during the pregnancy. Mostly cause he's never protective of me and I was in pain and he was worried lol but once his brother came he became over protective of him as well so anytime he'd cry and I wasn't around he'd come find me and say "mom your baby is crying!!" Other then that he didn't care for his brother 😅 he's now 4 and his brother is 1 and they drive each other crazy because the youngest is going through a faze of hitting. I'm now pregnant with twin girls and my oldest ask me every week if I'm sure they are sisters and not brothers. 😂

Answer

Once the baby arrives plan once a week alone dates (alternate which parent goes)....Lunch, dinner, parka fun outing. That way he can have some time when all the attention is on him and he  feels special

Answer

It's important to involve him of course, but also show him what's going to be the same after the baby arrives. Toddlers don't do well with change. With my first son,  I think there was too much focus on preparing him,  everyone talking about the baby and making a big fuss over him becoming a big brother, bought him a big brother gift  etc I think it just put pressure on him and it was a nightmare, he hated it and had huge tantrums for months. I think that approach might be good for older children but not toddlers. Pregnant with my 3rd baby,  I told the boys a baby was coming and we talked about babies occasionally, they saw my belly get big etc but otherwise we didn't talk about it unless they mentioned it,and we told family to focus on THEM when they came to visit and not on the baby coming. We assured my 4 year old about all the things that will be the same  (eg his routine, his room,  his preschool, bathtime with dad etc it seems obvious but they need to hear it) So basically life was same old same old except now we have a baby in the house, no biggie.  They did MUCH better with that approach than the "make a fuss" approach I read about online.

Answer

We read a book called "there's a house in mummy's tummy", let her feel her sister kick and move, taught her how to massage my bump to calm her sister, and then arranged for the baby to have a gift when she met her baby sister. After that I tried to involve her as much as I could with showing her how we change the baby's diaper, etc.

Answer

I have a 3 year old and I've been trying to prepare him since we announced we were having a baby. I tried to get him psyched up on all the things he can teach his brother and things he can do to help when the baby gets here. I had him talk to my belly and sing songs to him. That seems to have helped because he's now very excited to meet his brother next week :) good luck! ❤❤

Answer

Thank you all for your great advice. I will definetly be using some of your methods.

Preparing only child?

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