breakup

Karen • 💕🌈⚡️🌸 mommy of 3 calico cats 🐱|lover of Mother Earth 🌍🌼| middle daughter| psychology major| 27| S I N G L E 🦋
I broke up with my boyfriend of going on five years today.. it was one of the hardest choices I had to make and I still feel like I'm not sure... I love this guy I really do. 
I left him because he has zero ambition & now that I'm older I have expectations of him and it's like he has no motivation to create a future for us together... 
I really feel like I'm loosing my best friend someone who I grew up with. 
I'm still confused if I should move on or not.. he cried when I told him it was over & begged me not to let him go.. he said, Karen just let it be a break, just don't leave me...... 
idk why I feel so hurt ... but I feel like I had no other option.. I've told him countless amounts of times that I need to meet his family, that we need to get a place, engaged, move on with life. 
To stop spending money on drugs, to take me out on dates, to go back to college, to find a better job, to be emotionally there for me, stop with his shitty attitude, and calling me names.... I'm just over it!
I cannot have all the pull in a relationship and hold his hand. I'm not his mom I was his girlfriend! I tried my best to guide him in the right direction... sometimes words are just air pointless air ! 
I don't know what else to do? 
Should I move on? 
Or stay & work on it? 
He's like don't give up on me now... 
just give me time.. , but I gave him fucking almost five years...
Shit I am upset.... I feel like I was never enough he doesn't get that.