Did I make a mistake?

So im 39 weeks today and my doctor finally asked if I would like my cervix checked and I said no. She hasn't checked them at all since she normally won't unless absolutely necessary which is fine with me. And i figured I really would want it checked and even considered asking her to look anyways. But today when she asked I flat out said no. I would really like to know if I am dilated any but at the same time I like having the suspense of not knowing. And I also feel if she were to tell me then I would get too anxious. Did I make a mistake? Now I'm second guessing myself even though it is a little to late to go back now. But my husband even asked about it and I just lied to him. I know he would have been excited to know so knowing that I said no to the offer would probably have irritated him.