If I don't get my bfp this month

So in on my 12th month ttc. After a chemical pregnancy and trying solidly for a year I still haven't been blessed with a bfp. If I get a bfn this month and AF arrives I have decided to take a few months break and begin to use condoms again. The heartbreak makes me miserable and although today I am very positive I just don't want to go into 13months ttc. But I will still be sticking around on glow to support everyone else! I'm cd9 today and hopefully this is my month!