Do you believe that abusive partners can change?

Question

I was engaged to a wonderful man a while back, and eventually broke it off because there were a lot of problems on both sides of the relationship.

One was that he was physically abusive- I was never seriously hurt but I was slapped, bit, etc. Although it
is not an excuse, he was also sick and not on meds at the time.

We were apart for a while and it was very hard. We are back together now and he is so different. He is so sorry for his actions and we are both better after the break up we experienced. We have talked about it a lot and I think he has changed.

I do not feel like he will hurt me again (if he did- no chances, I'd leave asap). We are so in love and I genuinely feel that he has changed. Even if he accidentally snaps at me- he catches himself and apologizes. We just got back together but at this point it seems that he has changed. My friends call me stupid but I was supposed to marry this man and if he is not hurting me and we are in a healthy relationship now I do not see a problem. We make eachother so happy.

Do you think that abusive partners can change?

Answer

I was in an abusive relationship for a whole year. He never changed even when he said he would. Ill be careful if i were you because he might just be doing this to fall back into your good graces. So be careful.

Answer

It seems to me that the fact that you felt the need to enquire on this issue says a lot about how unsure you really are. Biting and slapping are very bad ways to treat someone you're suppose to love...and if he is already back to snapping at you it won't be long before he won't be able to hold back. It's your choice but it sounds as if you're making a very unhealthy decision by continuing a relationship with him.

Answer

It is possible, but I would be very wary and take things very slowly. Things are going well now, but the true test will come when times are difficult. Always make sure you can talk to someone you trust and watch out for red flags like jealousy, dissing your friends, putting you down, and trying to control your money. Your friends love you and are trying to look out for you, so don't be surprised if they don't welcome him with open arms. He hurt you and he doesn't deserve their trust yet.

Answer

No, I'm sorry i took back an abuser more times than I can count, he never changed.

Answer

No, but they can get more manipulative.

Answer

Nope I don't

Answer

Yes. My step dad beat my mom 7 years ago they are going on 11 years now and he's the best and only Dad I have.

Answer

No. Period. It's an "illness/sickness"

Answer

I believe anyone can change. However, no matter how much i believe in humanity, i also learn from past experiences. Be very very cautious, but also slightly hopeful.

Answer

People only change when they want to, because they see their behavior as an impairment to something in their life.  Unless he thinks his behavior is a problem, and a big enough problem that it causes major discomfort in his life, no change will happen.  Think about this: are you comfortable with marrying this man, as he is right now?  If you aren't, don't wait for change.  You can't make it happen.  Only he can.

Do you believe that abusive partners can change?

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