So I really don't know how to help my sister.

BACKSTORY:

My sister and I come from a divorced home and lived primarily with my dad who is very emotionally and verbally abusive and a high functioning alcoholic. My mother has been on drugs and an alcoholic all of our lives.

My sister got on drugs around 17 got pregnant at 19 and stopped the drugs during pregnancy. She stayed clean for about a year after her daughter was born. But then got started again. Around October 2016 child services stepped in and took custody of my niece and placed her with our very crazy grandmother. Who does NOT need to be raising this baby. However all the crazy things my grandmother has done isn't documented so apparently child services doesn't care because she isn't physically abusive and can provide a safe place for my neice.

In November my sister was in a terrible wreck and died on scene then revived. She suffered severe head trauma and we were told severe brain damage.

The doctors did the best they could to repair her face but it's... well... its different. The brain damage was not as bad as what we were told to expect but she does have some "issues" primarily not being able to control emotions, no concept of time, and a very bad short term memory, and some things just "don't click". She is Almost childlike sometimes.

After she was released from the hospital she went to my dad's who started emotionally and verbally abusing her. Trying to control her by withholding doctor visits, meds, screamed at her for peeing the bed (she can't help it.. since the wreck she has had trouble). All sorts. Well my sister left and went to my mom's where my sister got back on drugs.

About 2 months ago she tried to kill herself and was admitted into the hospital and then went to drug rehab.

Well she has been clean for almost a month and is staying at my dad's and sometimes with our crazy grandmother. They are both constantly belittling her and putting her down and yelling at her and won't take her where she needs to go (dr., AA meetings, nothing).

So my sister calls today telling me she is going to kill herself or get back on drugs but she doesn't want to relapse she wants to die. She is also on anti depression meds which I think needs to be altered because I think the suicidal thoughts are worse. I'm over 700 miles away with a very small baby. I can't get to her easily. She won't call the suicide hotline.. And if I called the ambulance they won't take her unless she wants to go or needs medical attention.

I did my best to talk to her and calm her down and I did. It worked. For now.

But here is where I need help: she wants help but won't actually do anything to get help! She could easily get on disability (she needs to, the wreck has left her not only emotionally incapable but a few other physical issues), get insurance (she is on my dad's and he is using that to control her, or won't give her the insurance info when she needs it because he doesn't want to pay the deductible/copays and be responsible for any unpaid bills), get into a living facility. Slowly work on transportation and getting her life back togehter.

But she won't reach out to get help from someone who could help her. My family will not help her. Basically she needs transportation. *Again my dad is the most selfish asshole who ever lived and won't take a fucking off day to take my sister to the disability office and to her doctors to get her paperwork. But it's all to control her. But not the point*

I have arranged for transportation to get her to the disability office and to the doctors. But she wont take it. (I dont know why she wont!?!) Basically she wants to get help and her life straight but she wants someone to do it for her. Which no one but her can really do. And I can't make her understand that she has to do this (again this is a mental issue from the wreck).

I just don't know how to help. Because I can't do this for her? I also don't know what else to do about helping her through the suicidal thoughts.

I just feel so helpless and so angry that I can't help her. Thoughts/ advice/sugestion?

Update to the commenters:

1. Alabama

2. And I have suggested she live with me (there is a lot more to this story but I'm trying to give the shortest version) but she doesn't want to. There is several reasons why she doesnt want to and they are pretty solid points. Such as she wants to be close to her daughter in case something happens.