She was not planned at all. We had just had our 3rd son and were just separating after trying to make it work an extra year . It hurts my heart to know that my last two babies will be born into a household of just momma. But I know I have more then enough love for them!!! It's so much better then seeing momma cry and daddy do what he wants . I'm blessed with my mom and family support . Maybe it's just the hormones or the realization that after a 9 year relationship and soon to be 4 children it's over... only God knows home much I must really need her to give her to me at a time like this! She's due 20 days often her brother turns one!!! Nervous but excited.