so i guess this is the first step...

I'm depressed.

I am sad and miserable and feel like there is no way out of my current situation. I even think about what the world would be like without me in it. I feel even worse because I know this is affecting my unborn child.

In the past year, I have turned into the most negative person I know. I can feel it by the way people act around me and treat me. And I hate it and myself for it.

I can't afford to seek professional help right now between my usual bills and OB visits. I don't have any friends and anyone else I'm close to just doesn't want to hear it anymore. Even my dog is sick of seeing me cry.

I don't know what else to do. I don't want it to get worse. I don't want to harm my child any longer. I don't want me to be the reason my relationship falls through. I don't want my family to suffer if I were to ever go through with any of my thoughts.

Please help