My nerves are too bad to lose my virginity

I've been with my bf for almost 9 months and we have been trying to have sex for a while, but I'm a virgin and I have severe anxiety. Everyone I know has told me it will hurt. So when we try he barely gets it in and I clench and it hurts so I back out. This has been going on for several months now and I don't want him to leave for college and not had sex yet. Help.