So in December 2016 my bfs oldest daughter (3yrsold) came to live with us she was removed from her mother's care. The mother is in jail she had a charge of abuse/neglect and two drug charges of making and distributing meth and cocaine. Her dad didn't see eye to eye with me about writing letters or receiving calls, at the time were beneficial but have just caused problems now. She has a lot of emotional and behavior issues, and when receiving the calls she is initially excited very happy, but that quickly turns to heart break because the calls are only maybe 20 minutes long. Her mom keeps telling her she's getting out soon and can't wait to hold her kiss her etc and that they'll go do stuff together but it's not realistic. Her plea to get a lesser time in prison was 5 years serve 2yr, 5 years house arrest, 1 year of probation. With good behavior and the 10 months shes already gonna have served she will only serve like a year. But with the probation and house arrest I already know she won't be able to come visit and my step daughters dad refuses to let her visit in prison . So that end of it, I don't feel it's a good idea for calls anymore the longer she goes without them, she gets upset acts out more or if certain things are mentioned in the calls she has set backs pees herself or poops and hides it and hides under beds. This is a HUGE issue. Her grandparents have not been part of her life much either, and (we'll refer to as jane) Jane has visited twice hasn't been here in 5 months almost and wants to visit first week of September when she's visited before she discusses adult things in front of the child and talks about how when her mom is out of jail she will come home with her and everything will be okay and she can't wait till she's home. Which then sends my step daughter on a week of setbacks and convinced she is going home with her mom. Are we right by shutting them out? We've tried to avoid conflict but we both feel it's in her best interest not to have those people in her life anymore because of the emotional issues that follow each time and how worse it gets the longer without visits or calls. Lot has been going on this past month, we are trying to do a walk in at st Joe's so we can get her some help before it gets worse. Just scared of the drama that will follow if we stand ground and end communication with that family .