Disappointed

So yesterday, at 9DPO, I have light bleeding only when wiping. I began crying because the last month this happened I thought it was IB, but my period ended up showing up 3 days early. Now every time I go to the bathroom, I'm scared to look when I wipe - not sure if I'm still spotting but it honestly ruined my day. AF due Friday, so I guess I'll just keep "blind wiping" unless the spotting picks up.

TTC is disappointing and hard. How do you quit without actually quitting...