Baby shower drama!

So this week is hectic for us anyways, my husbands father was supposed to be in town all week for work. Which is also where my husband works but tomorrow is his birthday and he never has his dad there for any of his birthdays. Well last minute their boss decided not to send his dad to town. So now I've got a disappointed husband on my hands. Well Saturday is my birthday and my baby shower. Thankfully, his dad couldn't refund some tickets he had already bought so he will be in town for the baby shower. But my husbands mom will be there as well and she's lost her mind on multiple occasions. I don't want her in my sons life and we both chose this after we had already invited her. My husband wants to tell her not to show up at all and I feel bad since it is his mom and maybe she won't go nuts with 40 other strangers around her. (This is the first time our two families will be meeting each other) Well on top of stressing about her drama, and him not wanting her here in the first place. His best friends wife blew up on me today because I'm not a good enough friend apparently. Well apparently my husband and I aren't and we are only worried about the baby shower. Which I thought they were coming to town the Friday before so I had asked them so I could make up the bed for them. But apparently her husbands uncle just passed and I'm a horrible person because they have the funeral this weekend. I didn't even know about the uncle passing away so how I was supposed to know to not ask about this weekend when they told us they were coming I don't know. But i am so stressed over something I shouldn't even be stressed about. I tried to be sweet because she had made our son a little hat and my mom used it for decoration and sent her a picture because I wanted her to know how much we all loved it and she acted as if I was bothering her. I'm at my limit, I feel like if anyone else causes any more personal issues for the baby shower I'm just going to have to ask them to go home. It's just way too frustrating.