My mum

I wish my mum wasn't so insensitive. I know she's my mum and I love her very much, I'm not a bad daughter. I listen to her and I never argue with her.. but I'm always crying myself to sleep because of her. I wish she would stop calling me fat, I gained weight the past year and she never stops bullying me for it. She tells me I'm ugly now that I'm fatter and I should wear clothes that hide my body. I try my best to lose it in the healthiest manner but when she bullies me about it, it always drags me back into bad habits like starving, vomiting and smoking. She tells me I'm useless and stupid, and that I'm a bad role model because I'm a failure. (I had to take extra time to finish highschool after being depressed and attempting suicide) She tells my little sisters to not become like me.

Okay, now I'm crying for some reason typing this. But I honestly just wish she could listen and that I could talk to her about things and not be afraid of her taunting me for it. I've tried once to tell her I'm depressed and she laughed in my face. I missed out on having a loving mother and I'm really envious of people who got that experience.

Sometimes I just want to disappear, I feel that I'm just a burden and life would be easier for everyone around me if I was just gone. I don't have the money to move, and there's no way she'd allow me to leave.

Sierra: no, there isn't :(

Karliann: thank you for those kind words! it made me really happy, thank you. ❤️

Kennedy: I can relate :(