FED UP

I've been struggling a lot lately. I just started a new nursing job which is killing me because I'm having to learn the new computer systems and the doctors are frustrated because I may send the wrong message because I'm still training right now and then they report it to my supervisor and she comes to me with her computer pointing out all of the things I did wrong according to the doctors. So that's getting me down. Next month will be one year TTC with PCOS failed clomid failed one month of Letrozole I've lost 50 pounds. AF was three days early this month 😢😡 and we are trying so hard to conceive. My husband thinks I'm incompetent he expects me to come home take care of all of our animals (trust me it's a lot) have the house clean, the laundry done, etc. and I've worked 8+ hours the whole day. I have a history of self harm and all this piling up on me beings those thoughts back. Especially when AF comes or I see pregnant women or couples with new born babies it's hard holding back that feeling. I was "clean" for 5/6 years but just recently started again but it's occasionally very occasionally. Just needing some emotional support. And some success stories TTC with PCOS after a year