Placing our baby

Prepare for a little bit of a rant haha

4 years ago I found out I was pregnant. My boyfriend and I were 17 and decided to place the baby up for adoption. He has a wonderful family and we get to see him all the time. The baby's father is now my husband. We've been married for a year and have been trying for another baby for 11 months...I didn't realize that it would be so hard this time around. I didn't think about how much it would make me miss my little boy. It makes me regret what I did. Wonder if I can't have anymore kids?! Wonder if we gave away our only biological child away, and I'll never be pregnant again?! It's just hard sometimes...sorry! Rant over haha