Since December of last year, my boyfriend and I have been talking about getting a visa for him. I just started college so I can't do it, but he's taking a gap year. When he came to visit me over the summer he filled out the visa application and sent it off. We discussed it regularly and it seemed like something we both really wanted and were excited about.

However, about a week ago he told me he didn't want to do it anymore. He said he only did it because I was pressuring him to and made him feel like he didn't have an option. And it broke my heart. Not only to have all of my excitement and happiness ripped away from me, but to basically be blamed for all of it. I took a break from talking to him for about five days, I was so hurt. When we started talking again He told me that he doesn't want to lose his job (which is part time but whatever) and wants to spend more time with his brother who is having some life issues. Which is a way better way of telling me than to say I was forcing him to get a visa. I told him to just let me know when he plans to come and I won't get involved further than that. I also told him to own up to his actions instead of blaming others.

Things are not great right now. I am hurt because he made a final decision in a week from something he's been saying he wants to do for months. I really wish he would've at least kept the option open. I feel like I can't talk to him because I don't want my feelings to be twisted by him saying that I'm controlling. I don't even know when I'll see him again and I don't even feel like I can ask. He says he does want to come back but he doesn't know when. I am so frustrated and sad and idk what to do or how to feel.