what do you guys think?

my boyfriend lives an hour away and i’ve been going to stay with him every weekend (friday-sunday)for about a month now and he’s in the military so he’s getting ready to leave in a couple of days. i just want to spend as much time as i can with him because i’m actually happy with him. so i came home from being with him and then he called me later that night and i was talking on the phone with him and my sister had just got home from work and she’s just like, “so you spend all your time with him and then come home and he still gets all of your time.” at the time i felt really bad because that’s my sister and i love her, we do everything together so i told my boyfriend i’d call him back and i apologized to my sister and told her i would manage my time better. so when i’m around my sister, i try not to talk to my boyfriend and i don’t even feel comfortable bringing him up so i try not to.

i think about everything at least 100 times 😂 so i’ve been thinking that, that’s kind of not fair on her part. she works everyday except one day and our mom works sunday-wednesday so i watch my nephew (her son) every day until Thursday when my mom is off. i don’t do anything but watch my nephew sunday-wednesday, there’s times where i can’t do what i want/need to do (job interviews, just being a 20 yr old) because i’m tied up taking/dropping them off to work and taking care of my nephew. it’s hard sometimes being tied up but they’re my family and i love them so i will make that sacrifice but i feel like if i want to go have fun then i should be able to.

when she had a boyfriend he would be there every single day/night and he would have her time and i could’ve either spent time with her and her boyfriend or not at all so i don’t get it. she put him before me in a lot of things so i just don’t get it.

i talked with my boyfriend about it and he thinks it’s my life and i should be able to live it how i want. whenever i say i’m hanging out with my sister he’s just like i’ll call you later and then i feel bad about that bc he just wants to talk. he also says that i don’t live with my decisions, i think about it over and over and i feel bad while my sister is doing okay and i’m not. i’m so empathetic that i forget about my feelings and it’s so stressful.