how do you all mothers manage newborn phase without any extended family help?

Question

my head is just not getting this. you all are so brave, some of us are single mothers too. how do you manage night feedings, bawling crying babies? how do you get rest or just shuteye? I feel so weak by looking at you women and I am yet to have my baby in my hands, just these last nights before delivery is getting me tired.

Accepted Answer

Put simply, You do because you have to

Answer

Nights are the absolute worst. Especially when we hit a growth spurt. The past 2 nights my LO has wanted to eat constantly. It’s enough to break ya down but I just have to remember that it won’t last forever and that she’s my baby and she obviously needs something! It’s not easy. I broke down last night and my hubby had to take her for a few minutes. Something inside you takes over and you realize that you’re the mom and it’s your job to meet this baby’s needs!

Answer

Those first few weeks are honestly not nearly as bad as some parents make it sound. I definitely felt that people over exaggerated a lot haha we live 3,000 miles from family and my husbands military. So while I do have my husband home when he’s not at work, it’s just me a good 85% of the time and I manage just fine! Newborns sleep so much during the day. All they need is food, sleep and a clean diaper haha

Answer

Go to sleep early. I didn't think it was so bad, he slept 3 hours at a time. My husband and I took turns. When he went back to work I got up with baby Monday through Friday and my husband did weekends.

Answer

I lived with my mum but I had no help at all (my SO is useless) and also I was breastfeeding. nighttime feeds are the. hardest, but you HAVE to get up. turn on a dim light, sit a chair with something like a TV on and feed baby. if you can, get help from your SO. if your bubbie doesn't wanna sleep, what I suggest is swaddling and rocking gently while patting their bottom firmly in a rhythm.
It's hard. there is a lot of tears and that's okay. It's good to cry. if you need to step out and scream and cry while baby is doing the same, out them in a safe place and step out. keep your sanity. your baby can't come first if you aren't looked after.

Answer

My mom tried helping it made me more stressed...was happier just doing it with hubby.

Answer

Omg it's so hard! I even had my mom with me for a few weeks but when she left we really felt it because we have no other family around. My husband was a superman the whole time and still is. He used to help me by waking me up and sitting with me for feedings when I was extra knocked out or sometimes bottle feed the baby once in a while to let me get more rest. He is really good at sharing the weight of this experience. It's wonderful but incredibly challenging at times. I have no idea how single moms survive that phase all alone, they deserve a huge huge award! Thank God my baby now sleeps well through the night and has finally started taking regular day time naps. Breastfeeding is still brutal but we are managing. All the best to you with your delivery!

Answer

My body has started to basically run off of adrenaline. I'm learning how to feed and change diapers in my sleep. Almost quite literally, Im barely awake to change my daughter's diapers in the night. I'm letting my instincts take over and I take advantage of her naps and baby wearing to get things done during the day. I'm tired all the time now so I'm just waiting for the nights she let's me sleep 5 hours at a time. You do what you have to and stay positive about it

Answer

I have my Husband but had an awful and slow recovery. He had to go back to work after 2 weeks so I did nights too (he has to travel so I don't want him driving exhausted) So he helps out after work (7pm-bed) and on weekends. Other than that I didn't ask for any family help. Autopilot takes over and you have to just keep going. When my Son started sleeping through the night I was thrilled, but also had a little meltdown of emotions where I think the previous few months all caught up with me. You manage Mama. My son is 1 this week and I'm 21weeks pregnant. I sometimes struggle with my mind panicking at night about how I'm gona cope. But it's not forever, just hard for the first few weeks until you get a decent night sleep. Then it gets easier. Well, maybe not easier but at least you feel more rested and 'I got this!'. I usually clean etc when baby sleeps but when I felt drained at the start, every few days I'd use one of his naps to have a bath and do nothing but soak and relax whilst baby slept. Then you get out feeling more refreshed and ready for the rest of the day.

Answer

Research and time management.

how do you all mothers manage newborn phase without any extended family help?

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