Asexuality?

Question

I have been going some research lately about either I am ace or not... I don't know what to think. The descriptions I have read vary person to person so I don't know for sure if I am ace. 
Would anyone share their experience identifying as asexual?

Answer

I identify as asexual and pan-romantic, I haven’t ever felt sexual attraction towards anyone I’ve every cared about/crushed on/dated. I’ve only ever had romantic feels towards people. 
That doesn’t mean I don’t like sex, i just don’t really feel sexually attraction to people or the need. 
But that doesn’t mean I don’t get horny ect. I just don’t feel it towards people or anyone that is all. 
It’s a more recent discovery about myself and makes a lot of sense. But again different per-person.
Hope it helped!

Answer

Hi there! So the technical definition of asexual is that you don't experience sexual attraction, but a lot of people use it to mean that they don't have any sex drive or sexual desire.
All of this also gets confusing if you haven't experience any of these things before too! I'm asexual (and I use it to mean all three of the things above), but to my understanding, sexual attraction is when you look at a person and become aroused and think "wow, I'd like to fuck them." Food analogy, because we aces love food: when you look at a cake and think, "Wow, that cake looks delicious. I sure would love to eat that." (We live in a culture where this experience is normalised, but a lot of asexual people, myself included, grew up thinking it was like this big joke that everyone was in on. It sounds fake to us. How could you just *look* at a person and want to fuck them?!)
I think sex drive/libido is your body's physical need for sex, similar to a need for food or water. (This could be wrong, please don't shout at me if it is. I have no sex drive, so I'm basing this off of things I've read and I may have misunderstood. I'm just trying to make it easier to understand for potential aces.)
Sexual desire is how much you want sex, similar to how you might crave cake. So some asexual people use the term to mean they don't experience sexual attraction, whereas some experience none of these (or very few/very rarely)--basically, they just aren't interested in sex. A lot of aces enjoy sex anyway, because it feels good (like how you might eat cake because it tastes good, even though you weren't hungry and weren't craving it), but they don't *need* it or actively seek it out. (Well, I guess they could seek it out just because it feels good, but that's not why non-aces want sex, I guess.)
I feel like I've begun to confuse even myself, so I'll stop here. But I will also tell you that most of the time, if you're questioning whether you're asexual and doing all this research on it, you probably at least fall on the spectrum. So, welcome! And feel free to ask any more questions you may have or anything you might be curious about. Nothing is off-limits!

Answer

I discovered I was on the ace spectrum after a terrible relationship with someone who coerced me into sex. I guess mine was kind of trauma related in that sense, but I just... I didn’t have any interest in it, even before that event. 
It took me a while to work it out and I remember making a list of things I was and wasn’t comfort with. Kissing, holding hands, cuddling? All good. Sex? I gotta get to know you really well first to even be comfortable discussing it but if not, I can go without. With this in mind, I did some googling and learnt about different parts of the ace spectrum.
I now happily identify as demisexual, which means unless I have a proper emotional bond with someone, I have no sex drive. For example, I’ve been with my partner for nearly four years. It took me 6 months to feel comfortable enough to even discuss the possibility of sex. Now I’m with him, I love sex. But if we broke up, I’d go back to not being bothered. We’re also long distance so while other people would masturbate in place of sex, I again have absolutely zero interest. It’s just him.
Basically, there’s a lot of different aces! Like loads of other things in the world, it’s a spectrum!

Asexuality?

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