Taking a break

Cynthia • 30 years old and have a wonderful boyfriend, Bryant, and a 10 year old beautiful little girl, Alyson.
Okay, so I think I need to stop testing. It's almost become an obsession. I test every single day and I have to do it in secret so I'm not caught. Clearly, that's not healthy. 
I haven't had a period since my mc. 
I'm even to the point where I stress if my boyfriend doesn't cum. I don't care if I do or not, just as long as he does.
Looking into getting help as this really isn't good for me. 
I'm just not happy anymore and my boyfriend deserves so much more. Any ideas on how to just stop thinking about it?