Am I wrong?

Question

Am I wrong for being really upset at my husband because he still doesn't want to try for our 1st baby? We talked about this extensively before we even got engaged... he knows how much children mean to me, and he knows how badly I want a baby... He's also been told there is a possibility he is infertile, but no real testing was ever done. So my point is, and always has been... We should start ttc now, becuase if something is wrong... no Dr will even look at us until we've  been ttc for a year or more... So am I wrong to cry and get angry and upset when the topic comes up? Am I wrong to actually be a little depressed about it.

Answer

No! If it was part of the agreement when dating and before marriage then you need to have a “ come to Jesus” moment. Deal breakers are real and he should not string you along if he loves you. Don’t let him take that away from you if it means that much. It should be a mutual decision and you deserve to have a partner that is just as excited if not more to start a family if you feel that way. Maybe he just needs time but you need some honest answers as to what he wants and expects and you also need to stand firm.

Answer

If thing to conceive within the tonne you have already been married, it's something you agreed on before marriage, then you are absolutely within your rights to be upset.
All the midst successful marriages, are built around the fact that marriage is intended to be a transparent contractual agreement between two people who love and respect one another, and if you have faith, God. 
If it's something he agreed was part of each of your expectations entering into marriage, it is pretty low for him to try and bail out of that promise now. Part of being in a marriage, is the ability to accept and respect each other's needs, and the ability to understand that for the rest of your life, there will now be not just one, but two equal voices in any and all decisions being made. Two voices that each hold equal weight in the outcome of any choice that affects your marriage. 
However, if he did not agree to try and conceive by this time in your marriage, I'm afraid that you really do not have the right, to be angry with him. If the two of you agreed that you would try for children at the time in your marriage that you both felt was right, then he is completely within his rights, to ask you to respect the fact, that he does not feel it is the right time yet. 
Marriage is compromise. Some of the compromises are easy. Like negotiating closet space. Some are much harder, like relocating for someone's career, or deciding when the time is right to have a baby. 
Perhaps you should try talking to him, and asking what reasons are leading to his feelings that it is the wrong time to try for a baby. Perhaps some of them are reasons that you can find a solution for. However if it simply not something he is prepared to give at this time, you have a very important question to ask yourself. 
Does this outcome matter more to me than my marriage? 
If the answer to that question is no, then you need to respect his reasons. Give him time and space to breath, and drop it for a few months(4-6). 
Then when you do bring it up again, speak from a place of love, not a place of accusation. If you speak from resentment, like he is an obstacle between you and having a baby, he will feel attacked instead of respected.
If he still feels that he is not ready, refer to my above question. 
Does this outcome, matter more to me than my marriage?
Eventually he will either agree to start trying for a baby, you will decide your marriage is more important than a baby, or you will decide having a baby is more important to you than your marriage. 
Either way, I wish you the best!

Am I wrong?

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