Before i can begin my rant. I wanna admit, i have a good life. Probably more fortunate than many people. But I’ve had my up and downs, lost my mum at 20, broken engagement, turbulent relationship, confused career, depression etc.

But right now, life feels fine from a third perspective, i am getting married soon, have a beautiful dog, im healthy and have a very supportive family. Yet...

I feel disappointed, in myself. A constant reminder of how incompetent i am and how i could have been better. All that i should be, all the ‘perfect’ way my life could be lived, if someone else was living it. I tell myself “someone else would have enjoyed this so much better”.

I am unhappy and dissatisfied all the time. And i wish to get out of it. I have read over a thousand self helps, written journals on how i need to be better, but i am not able to apply any of those things or ideas.

I dont wish to start this new chapter of my life with the same thinking iv been stuck in years.

What do i do?

PS - i have no solid career right now even though i hold an architecture degree.