So I have a cousin, she is pretty and when we both walk in the mall, people would glance or turn their heads. She loves make up and loves to take care of her skin.

I have always been in awe on how strict she can be abt her skin care. I wish I could have that kind of discipline. But I just can't.

Me, I am the opposite.

I am very relax about my looks, too relax that I sometime underdress. I dislike the feeling of make up on my face, especially lipstick and gloss. Sticky and unpleasant.

I feel we are both attractive but in a different way, but not in a bitchy way though. Just girly way 😂

Just few year ago, she got attached with this guy. After they were official, she brought him along to our outings. My first impression was that he is a nice gentleman. So I am happy for both of them.

Me n my cuz are so close, that we go on double dates w our boys. But that time I was single, so it was the three of us chillin out.

Weeks passed, my cousin was deeply in love with him. She talked abt how good and caring he is, how lucky she is to find him... etc...

Then... one unfortunately day, he sent me a text saying that he had a crush on me. I was like wth?!

I was angry because my cousin was in love with him. So instead of telling the truth to my cuz, I tried to remind him about what makes him fall in love with my cuz in the first place. Talked to him about the good qualities my cousin has, and how cool she is to be a girlfriend and long term partner.

So he understood and that was it. Things go on as usual. Til one day my cousin was very pissed at me without reason... she lashed at me for no reason at all! I was devastated because what she did really hurt me.

After 2 months in the dark, i confronted her and she said that I tried to steal her man. I was surprised and so angry, because that was never the case! Like ever! I would never do such thing. I sincerely did not want her to get hurt.

I dont know what happened between them, either she checked his phone and found the text he sent to me about having a crush on me OR he dump her and told abt his feelings for me, I have no clue. Because from that day on, she rejects my call and give me the silent treatment.

And since then, I lost my cousin... I lost my little sister, my little cousin! And I cant stop blaming that idiot that cost me my relationship with my cousin. It was so sad because she is my only girl cousin. We had so much fun since we were young. But now it is over.

It has been 2 years now... i know it may sound overly touchy feely dramatic, but when I care for someone I truly deeply <a href="https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.glow.android.nurture">nurture</a> them. After all I am a Cancer...

I felt like someone I truly love had died forever... I try not to think abt it, because I know she wont. But she is just my baby cousin. Took care of each other for 20yrs. We grew up closer than any blood sister could ever be.

Sorry I just needed a place to share my heart. It has burdened me for years...

Should I have done things differently?

UPDATE

Thank you for all your messages. I really appreciate that you guys read my story and respond.

You girls are right, I should have told her that he is not good, eventhough that would have shatter her heart.

I have tried writing few emails to her, telling her how much i missed her, and asked what really happen to us, also wishing her happy birthday, or happy new year... and even happy wedding... not a single nice word. If she ever reply, it would be verbal, never written, and it is always nasty... cold and nasty...

I tried talking to my aunt not long after that happened, but she did not care... whats worse was that I heard that my aunt believe I was a bad influence for my cousin... It was really eye opening for me, because I really love my family, and that moment made me realize that I am alone. Its everybody for themselves...

I must learn to be strong... and now I just have to accept that people change, may it be for the worst or better. People come and go...

Thanks girls, I really appreciate your comments. I will be stronger.