Home / Community / Sex & Relationships

i want to die right now

i m laying down in bad right now , it's not my bad , it's my co workers bad , she tald me i can stay at her house till i go back to my country ,which is in 2-3 months ( i cant smoke or drink , that's why i m here on glow )

i met a guy , April 2014 , may 9 2014 was our first day and ever since we been together all the time , was the best time of my life ... in august i moved in with him ( first time for me leaving with a man we both were 28 )

till December everything was perfect

he went back to his country to visit his family for 20 days

when he came back , i realised smth happened , he changed a lot !!! later i found out that all time he was lieing to me about our future together , that together we will move to Swiss , that we ll get married .. and live happy .. about the kids all of that was lies

and the ugly truth was that his parents found a virgin teen girl for him to marry !!!! and that the engagement going to be this august !!!!

as soon as i found out that , i left

i went to live in some motel , with the little stuff i had couse when i moved in with him i didnt take any of my big stuff or furniture ..

i was in a motel for a 5 days

and 5 day he showed up there couse all this time he was looking for me at my job ( but my heart was broken i didnt work , i couldn't move i couldn't breathe )5 day someone tald him where i m ( my friend )

he came to pick me up

he was crying like a baby promising me that he ll tell his father to cancel that !!! he was begging me

and i forgived him .. we started living together again , but he didnt talk about future again me neither

3 weeks ago i found out i m pregnant .... i m 9 weeks now

and here everything strated again ,

he tald me " but you know i couldn't cancell my engament , couse it will brake my father heart , he ll die if he finds out i want to marry a foreigner , not virgin. and my age , he started saying so much things

i couldn't breath , i didnt even think of removing my baby , my child , no way

he didnt offer after i tald him that

but he said you better go back to your country and live there with the child , i ll come visit you every year

i called my co worker asked her to stay with her

he brought me here himself ,and left .. without even saying good bye , just left

i m here in this someone bad and i want to die .. for which reason i have this huge pain ? never in my life i hurted someone ,or betrayed someone or did any harm , why i have to suffer like this ? the worst pain ever ... why why why

all i wanted to be happy , with a man , have a cosy house , be a good wife

he said he lied to me again , couse he couldn't stand me being far away from him , that i was a piece of him

but now when i have his child he through me away , almost on the street

couse if i dont pay my rent , i will be on the street .....

Comment