Should I be offended? Boyfriend + Christmas

Question

I’m not sure whether I’m behaving appropriately in feeling really disappointed in my boyfriend this year. I have been with him for 5 years. 
So I’m Australia it’s currently christmas eve. I won’t see my boyfriend on Christmas Day as we decided to spend it with our own families which I think is quite lovely actually.  So that means we do presents on Christmas eve which is now. So we went into his room to do presents and I got him 100ml of “one million” perfume ($110), 2 Nike shirts, a long sleeved going out shirt, cards against humanity game, some chocolate and some alcohol. Then it was his turn and he actually hasnt got me anything... he said he doesn’t know what to get me and “just hasn’t got around to it.” 
I don’t know, I just felt really disappointed in him. I mean I don’t want to sound selfish, I don’t want anything. But even just a card and some chocolates would have been nice. 
Do I have the right to feel disappointed or am I overreacting?

Accepted Answer

5 years together and he couldn’t think of a single thing to give you!? Yeah, I’d be offended! He knew you guys had planned to do Christmas together today. Christmas isn’t all about gifts but to get you absolutely NOTHING? That’s a slap in the face in my opinion.

Answer

Yeah I think you have a right to be offended. 
Presents and things like that are materialistic and I think you understand that. I think the reason you’re upset is that he didn’t make any effort at all, just a card and some chocolates would have been nice. It shows that he’s at least put effort into it and thought about you. 
So yeah, I can see why you’re upset. Don’t let it ruin your Christmas. X

Answer

I don’t think you are being selfish at all. For example, my bf and I️ decided together we wouldn’t spend money on gifts this year because money is tight. However, I still am giving him a card and maybe his favorite candy. It’s not like Christmas was a surprise and its the little things that matter. A card, or any number of non monetary things that show you mean something to him would have been fine. Sorry to hear this hun. Merry Christmas to you. 💕

Answer

Yeah no I’d be pissed and hurt

Answer

he is rude . I'd be so mad .

Answer

So I was with a man for three years, I never celebrated Christmas growing up because well, I had 12 siblings and we couldn’t afford it. My first “Christmas” I was a Buddhist in foster care, and my at the time boyfriend wanted to surprise me with Christmas...he got me perfume (I’m allergic), cheesecake ( super allergic), and flowers (guess what? Allergic too.) 
So at least, he didn’t get you things you’re allergic to, and hopefully this made you laugh a bit. 
I’m sorry hun, and you’re not being selfish, he should’ve gotten you something.💚

Answer

i no the feeling i have been with mine almost 8 years and i think 2 holidays outta 8 years i recieved something very small. im like dude you could have mad me card or planned an unexpecting night of popcorn and a movie when kids went to bed its the thought not the iteam.

Answer

After 5 years I would think you guys have a lot of christmases and birthdays etc to set the tone of gift-giving. Do you always give more than him or are better prepared? I do think it shows that he doesn’t put as much effort in, and since you do and he’s not picking up that it’s what you expect in return, it may permeate into other parts of the relationship. It doesn’t mean he’s a bad person, but usually couples try to make each other happy and he’s not missing signals your sending.

Answer

bust the candy n begin eatting it. put the shirts n cologne back in ur bag n tk it bck home. n when he ask about it tell him u didnt get back around to giving it bck to him

Answer

My husband actually waited til Christmas Day to go buy my present one year and everything was either closed or the shelves were bare. Seems like he gave me some money and some sad looking roses he found at a gas station but I’m not sure. It made me feel bad because I felt he didn’t care. He felt bad too. I know he does care but he’s just a horrible procrastinator. Drives me nuts. Oh he does much better nowadays so there’s hope for your guy still 😉

Should I be offended? Boyfriend + Christmas

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