Frustrated with a hint of hope (long)

So the dreaded tww is coming to an end. You know, where the gates of hell will open or a gift from heaven is placed onto your pregnancy test.

4mo ttc and although the last few months were fun making sure we got it on during my fertile week- it’s frustrating and stressful. I’m sure you girls feel the same. I LOVE this community and the girls I’ve become cycle buddies with and the commenters and the followers. The support here is beyond amazing!

This time around, my tww was a little different. Usually my af symptoms kick in a few days to a week before she “graces me with her presence” but this month, immediately following my O my boobs were extremely sore. Like, kept me awake at night sore. I mean, I’ve always liked massaging them or having my husband do it (lol tmi?) bc it’s a “good hurt” but this month, when I asked him to, I flinched bc it was so painful!

Fast forward to 10dpo. I felt ovulation cramps to the point where I had to bend over in the car. I was getting waves of nausea here and there throughout the week before and after I ate. Heartburn was a new thing which made me wonder. I was getting some diarrhea (sorry) in the mornings but not like I was getting sick. My stomach felt wonky throughout and every amazon cheapie strip came out negative from 9dpo to 13dpo. I did post one of a possible vfl but I tested the next day and stark white. Also tested w a frer and stark white at 12dpo. Today marks 14dpo with a possibility of the bitch arriving.

My boobs didn’t stop hurting, but became a lot less the last two days. Last night they started to hurt again on the sides (where they usually do when af comes) hubby and I had incredible sex and my nipples were super sensitive. (Sorry?) lol.

Usually I get cramps the night before/morning of her arrival. I mean I have today or tomorrow to get that but I really don’t have any other symptoms besides my boobs.

I’m frustrated with a hint of hope. Each month my symptoms try and trick me into thinking I’m pregnant. Since trying, my periods have become unbearable on day one. Throwing up with diarrhea and on the verge of passing out! My gyno and doctors all say it’s nothing to worry about, to make sure I stay hydrated the days before it comes and to eat leafy greens (I even had them test my iron levels bc I thought that had something to do w it but all normal)

I pray for everyone trying, that they get their bfp! I know how frustrating and heartbreaking each month is. Just want to let you all know I’m there for you ❤️