Jealous and tired.

Hi all.

I'm just mainly venting here as I am so very tired.

breastfeeding never worked out for me. Next best thing I could do was pump for baby. I've had a fine supply and baby has not yet had any formula in her 10 weeks.

I'm just getting so darn tired.

I hate that my baby and husband get to sleep through the night and I don't because I have to pump.

I hate that I can't go anywhere without my pumping supplies if I plan to leave for more than 3.5 hours.

I hate how degraded I feel when the only place I can pump is in my car if I am out with my hubs and family.

I hate the sound of this machine even though it helps me get food out for my baby.

I just want to know if this gets better?

I pump 6 times a day. I just wish I could go all night without pumping. I currently make it about 5-6 hours before I wake up soaked in milk and engorged. I'll happily pump every three hours throughout the day if I could just sleep for more than 5 hours at night.

Oddly enough though, the thought of switching to formula makes me sad? I'm not really sure why. I do wonder if it would be easier to make the switch at this point and wean from pumping.

Sorry for the rant.

I'm just. So. Tired.