When will I have my positive?

Almost 6 years ago I had a stillborn son. He’s my angle and looks over me o know he does. My husband and I have been trying to have a child for a while now and it seems like it’s not gonna happen. We are seeing one of the best specialist in our area and when have done leteozole clomid hcg shots the whole nine yards. I feel like I’m getting more and more depressed. I keep getting told I need to lose weight or it’s my PCOS or my Crohn’s disease. For those of us who have PCOS we know it’s not easy losing weight. I’ll be 38 in a few weeks and I feel like I’m getting too old to try to continue down this road. I just want my own happy beginning with my wonderful husband. I’m sorry for venting ladies. Thanks for listening.