I have had a long long journey when it comes to female health and pregnancy. I had my very first pregnancy in 2013 that ended in a miscarriage. I was devastated. I could only ask why? Why me? It hurt knowing there are people out there who do wrong in life and they can have children easily, but I can’t. We tried and tried and after 4 months of trying, my husband and I conceived with our rainbow baby girl. God finally blessed us 🙏🏼

In 2017, my husband and I decided we would like to try for our second. I went to the doctor because I wanted to make sure I was doing everything right. I went for my Pap smear and received a call a week later. The doctor said I had high grade cells on my cervix. I was shock, numb. I had no idea what I was going to do. I knew during the pregnancy with my daughter my pap returned with low grade/ unclassified. After my daughter my pap came back clear. I was confused why I was going through this. I went through with the LEEP procedure (which was not bad at all). The doctor conducted another pap. A week later he doctor called back and said I have CIN 2 cells in my canal which he has never seen. Ever. I was scared. He said to wait and see if this will clear itself out. I researched and researched and took a concoction of elderberry, selenium, turmeric and b12 complex. During that time I got pregnant. I went to the doctor and he conducted ANOTHER pap. That pregnancy did not last long and again I miscarried. All I could think to myself was, God has a plan and right now is not the time.

A few weeks later I received a letter in the mail. That letter stated “All lab results returned NORMAL!!” I was in disbelief. I immediately called my husband, my mom and shouted for joy! I did it!

After Christmas, my husband and I decided to try again and in the first try I got my BFP!! Due to my past history, I don’t get too excited until I know it is viable, but this one feels like a good sticky bean.

So shoutout to those who are losing hope, suffered multiple miscarriages and getting discouraged. Do NOT give up! The big man upstairs has a plan. I honestly believe I am not made to have boys or God does not want me to name my boy “Emmett” (It’s my own quirky way to remain positive). But he has a plan for everyone. Be patient. Stay positive. Never give up hope 💙