Did you dream about it?? (Long Story)

My husband and I decided to TTC in September 2017. I got pregnant and MC in early November. It was absolutely devastating. I was in a play with my best friend when the blood started. We went to the hospital that night and the doctor, who was very detached and unsympathetic, confirmed that I miscarried. My husband threw himself over my stomach and weeped. He kept apologizing and telling me we will keep trying.

It was a rough week. Telling everyone that we lost the baby. Telling my 6 year old son that we had to try for another one. Then the very next weekend. One week after the MC my husband, a police officer, gets a call for an unresponsive 4 month old. This baby had heart defects and wasn’t breathing. He revived the baby a few times until they got to the hospital and it didn’t make it. My husband’s heart was destroyed. He kept saying he was failing everyone and just couldn’t deal with it. He started applying for different jobs because he can’t handle that kind of loss again. It was months later that he told me he had been having nightmares of people leaving him or people dying every night. He is trying to get an appointment for a psychiatrist to get some PTO to clear his mind.

My son and I just took a small trip to Arkansas to see my family. It was at my dads house when we went to go eat seafood and I ate ONE mussel. (My stomach usually doesn’t handle them well but wth it was one) and that night I felt uneasy. Nauseous and lightheaded. I dreamed it. First in my dream I was fishing. I was standing on a dock and caught this big striper. I was holding it. Then I woke up. Drank some water. Back to sleep. I dreamt I was in a hospital holding twins. One wrapped in pink. One wrapped in blue. I woke up. Took a test.

I swear I saw the faintest line but I was only 8 DPO. I took to glow for answers and the girls immediately were saying they don’t see anything and kept giving me the sad negative bitmoji. (You can see the post)

So two days later after my husband flies in to stay the weekend and help me drive back I took another test.

The faint line! The oh so very faint line on my dollar store test gave me so much excitement. He told me to not tell him anything unless I was certain. So we drive 4 hours to see my Mawmaw and stop at target to get tests. I got to the bathroom immediately after getting there (she has no clue)

BOOM!!! THAT NIGHT!

I was ecstatic! This is Saturday night. ^1/13/18!

I got my BFP. So I took more tests to see if my lines were getting darker.

^Morning 1/14/18^

1/15/18

I am so excited. My husband is so excited. We’ve told immediate family and close friends because I want to many positive vibes and white light sent my way. I pray for a healthy pregnancy and healthy baby. (Maybe even babies!!)

I haven’t cried yet and don’t think I will until my first ultrasound. I can’t tell you that it doesn’t feel like the last one. I have nausea and am lightheaded and tired. I have the light cramps. I didn’t have any of this with the last one. I also got a positive before 4 weeks this time and my positive didn’t come through until after 5 weeks last time so my HCG levels are higher. My period wasn’t due until the 17th so I will keep testing to make sure my lines are getting darker.

I know this story was long but I am so excited and wanted to give hope to anyone who is going through a hard time. So excited for my family of 3 to grow!

Baby dust to all!