My mother doesn't allow me to see a gynaecologist. Please help! 😣

I'm 19 and my parents are very strict Christians. I am not allowed to have sex or get any guys close to me. But I've been getting close with a guy behind their back.

I realised that I might have vaginismus since it's impossible for me to have sex.

I went to a nurse and she tried checking my vagina and just her touching it sent a burning sensation and was so painful. I told my mother about this and that the nurse suggested me seeing a gynaecologist but my mother got really mad and said "virgins are not supposed to have her vagina checked"

And she said vaginismus is only with penis. She said that if the nurse did that she will break my hymen and now I'm not allowed to have that area checked or go to a gyn until I'm married. She said there is no need for me to get it checked before I'm married.

My boyfriend can get one finger in when I'm extremely aroused. Honestly, I want to be able to have sex and everything. How can I treat this problem myself?

What am I supposed to do?