It's been heavy on my mind lately and I KNOW ITS STUPID. I'm really just posting to get it off my chest. I had my first c-section 12 years ago due to fetal distress. I was fully dilated, nothing wrong with me per say, my daughter just wasn't tolerating labor well. My 2nd was a failed VBAC because I wouldn't dilate past 7 and I truly believe it was because I allowed so many interventions and my body wasn't ready to go into labor (membrane sweep, pictocin, etc.). I'm 29 weeks now and I can't get this dang thought out of my head that if I go into labor before my scheduled c-section that I'll just stay home as long as possible. I know it's a bad idea but I can't shake it. My friend just had her son and the day after went home and was moving and grooving and I just keep thinking about my depends, the stairs in my house and the fact that I'm going to piss myself and have trouble moving around. I don't want to accept my reality when I really need to. 😣