My abortion story at 23 & Married

My husband and I got pregnant 3 months into dating, got married 3 months after that & have a beautiful baby girl.

Fast forward a couple years....

My husband and I have gone through so many problems in our marriage, we barely knew each other when we got married. Well he’s finishing college & I have a good Ft job. In July I call to get my abc filled & they said I need to do my annual & wouldn’t give me the Birth control pills until I do my annual. They couldn’t get me in until end of December for my annual.. i was so upset. Well come August we had sex and the next day I took a Plan B pill a week later AF was supposed to arrive but didn’t, I took a test & was negative. Another week goes and still no AF so I take anitehr test and I got a positive.. I sat and stared at it while my daughter was in the bath. I call DH & I start crying. We haven’t been doing that good in our relationship, hesbeen messaging other women and what not. I felt sick & stuck. I immediately search abortion clinics & find one. The next day I call and make an appointment. They get me in the following week on Tuesday. DH has to work so I go alone. I have to fill out paperwork & they finally call me back. I have to pee in cup. & they take me to ultrasound room. Test was positive. Stomach Ultrasound they couldn’t find it, so they did vaginal and still couldn’t find anything. So after that I go into a room and they give me all my options and said they will re-do the ultrasound the day of my “procedure” just to be safe & actually see something. A week later I go for my procedure... kids aren’t allowed in & men can only stay in waiting room. We had no one to watch our daughter & the clinic was 2 hours away from home. So my DH drops me off & they go to the mall. I wait for what feels like forever & they call me back. They do blood work & then go to ultrasound. Still couldn’t see anything on the stomach ultrasound so they do vaginally. I can’t see the monitor but by the look of her face I could tell she sees it. She clicks to take the pics & I sit up and ask if I can see.. she said sure & got the monitor ready to show me, I felt like something was wrong with how she was acting... she turns it to me & says it’s TWINS... I’m in shock & ask if I can have a print out & she gives me one. She hands me a gown to put on & she waits in the other room for me. I just sit and look at the picture & just immediately break down.. I calm down before going into other room. I go in and we start more paper work and I break down again... she brings me water, crackers and some antibiotics.. she tells me if I don’t want to do this I don’t have too. I tell her I’m fine. I start getting hot so I move to the other side of the table & then the nurse comes in to put my IV cord in for the sedation. As soon as she does and leaves I immediately start sweating & get nauseous & dizzy. I open the door adn ask for help & I fall into the chair beside me almost passed out. They run in and get me cold rag and more crackers. I am absolutely miserable at this point. Physically and emotionally... I heard them say “she was already so upset after seeing the ultrasound & now she’s sick, bless her heart” & that made me feel comfortable. They tell me they are ready so I follow into a room & I’m shaking so bad.. they put me on the table/chair & say “ we’re gonna go ahead and start sedative since you’re so upset”... nect thing I remember is waking up at my car & they getting me in. I immediately look at my DH & start crying saying “IT WAS TWINS. IT WAS TWINS”... he doesn’t know what to say, he told me I didn’t have to go through with it if I didn’t want to.. but I was alone to make that decision. I had to see that alone.. I slept the rest of that day & I’ve been okay since. I look at that pic all the time. I don’t regret it, but my heart hurts.

Sorry this is so long.. I’ve not told anyone or talked to anyone about this except my DH.

It was the hardest thing I’ve ever gone through. Anyone have such bad experience?!