*sorry for the long post*

So this guy and I have been continuously flirting for a while. I didn’t know he had a gf when we first started flirting. Once I found out I stopped but he continued flirting so I guess I didn’t really think anything of it and continued well I got drunk one night and sent him some stuff that his gf saw and she got super mad at him and me. They are still together but we aren’t allowed to he friends anymore (we work together so we see each other every week) which sucks but I understood it.

Well then he started going behind her back and we kept doing stuff- he asked me if we were technically “friend with benefits” and I didn’t know what to say. I know I should feel awful about the whole thing because I can only imagine how I’d feel if I was in her shoes and my bf was cheating on me- but I forget everything about morals when I’m with him- so I guess I’m just asking for help because I can’t talk to anyone about it since he’s literally cheating on his gf with me... I know I’m not entirely to blame because I think that if he was happy in his relationship he wouldn’t need to get stuff from me but then I also think that I’m just a terrible person because I’m the “other girl” and I’m ruining his relationship.

I don’t want hate- I just need guidance because I don’t know how to fix it. I know that people are gonna say that I’m going to hell because believe me I tell myself that every time we hang out together. I just hate making myself feel horrible after the fact when I feel like I finally have something positive in my life when I’m with him.