This is the first photo I've taken of myself in months. I suffered from severe PPD. After I had my daughter, multiple people in my life felt the need to ask me if my "mother" even knew she had a Granddaughter. Absolutely not. I'm still not sure what people don't understand. This woman abused me in more ways than anyone could imagine. She always told me that I was ugly. No one would ever love me. How could they? She told me I was fat and "should go running." I weighed 115lbs. I always thought her words will forever affect the way I view my self.

She abandoned me when I was just 16. She walked right into my high school, grabbed me by the arm and said "We got evicted. I'm taking you and your brother down to get you tested. Someone is trying to steal your tribal rights." Confused? Well, so was I. She said crazy shit like that all the time. But, she was my mom. My dad left us a few short months before. She's all I had left. So I said" Okay, I'll go with you. You have to let me say goodbye to Jay first."

Jay was my first everything. We met when we were 13. He would try to copy of my spelling tests. He sat diagonally behind me. I thought he was cute, I made sure to make it easier for him. We started dating at 14. He meant more to me then he even could imagine back then.

My mother proceeded to pull me by the arm down the breezeway to the gym after agreeing to let me say goodbye. A friend of mine saw this happening and tried to ask me if I was okay. My mother just snapped towards him "Mind your own business you nosey little shit." and out the door we went.

I will never forget the following moments. I opened the gym doors to see Jay walking with his friends talking. He saw me and his face went white. My mother was standing just outside the door. He knew whatever was happening was the end. He ran over to me and said nothing as we walked through the doors. The door shut hard behind us, making that deafening sound that heavy metal doors tend to do. He asked me "What's going on? What's wrong Jade." I tried to swallow the lump in my throat. The lump that I had been there since the moment I saw my mother. I couldn't. I started to cry. "I have to go Jay. We've been evicted. I love you so much." We embraced." It felt like we would never let go. My mother started to scream at me, "Let's go!" I didn't. He wouldn't. She then proceeded to grab me by my ponytail, ripping me to the ground. I didn't budge. Jay's feet were firmly planted. I'd never felt so safe and loved. Surreal, considering what was going on around us.

Remember that friend I mentioned earlier? The one that saw me in the hallway. He quite possibly saved my life. He knew from my eyes that I was in danger. I could not speak, my eyes spoke for me. He went straight to the principal.

As my mother is yelling "Let go, you stupid bitch, let go!" Mr. Rungren comes flying down the hallway yelling "Get your hands off my student."

I saw the fear in my mother's eyes. The principal wasn't alone. Our security guard and two other male teachers were with him. She immediately let go. As she was about to exit the back door, she turned on her heel and yelled" Everything is your fault Jade. Don't forget that. Everything." Then she left. I never saw her again. Though, she will never exit my mind completely.

She will never know her Granddaughter. Lord willing, she will never even know of her existence.

I've battled my entire life to get where I am today. I will have to continue my fight until I draw my last breath. I know that. It's all worth it.

What happened to Jay?

Everything. We got married. We fell deeper and deeper in love. We created a beautiful daughter. Today, I'm 18 weeks and 4 days pregnant with our second little one. Most importantly, we never let go of each other. 9 years together. Every year is better than the last. Here's some photos of my beautiful family ❤️❤️ No matter where you are in your life, know it gets better. It really does. 💜 *****************update****************My brother ended up going with my mother. He was only 12. 2 years later, right after I graduated high school, I recieved a message from him on Facebook. It said "Hey Jade. Mom told me to get the fuck out of her life. That I keep people from giving us money." they were panhandling to get money most of the time. He told me that he was in Virginia. He had started hitchhiking. He was going to attempt to hitch hike all the way to Washington state at the age of 14. I told him to stay where he was and stay safe. That Jay and I would come get him. We left that night. I didn't have my liscense, let alone know how to drive. Jay drove the entire way. We barely slept. We got there in 3 days time. By the time we got there, he made it to Pennsylvania. He was temporarily under state custody. I only had a week to get there before I would have to go through the court system to get him back. I barely recognized him when I saw him. He was almost a foot and a half taller. His hair was long and matted. He looked like he had been doing hard drugs. Which he had. Basically since he left he became addicted to drugs and sex. At the ages of 12 to 14 my baby brother was so screwed up it made my stomach wrench. We made it back to Washington 4 days later. We fed him, and fed him some more. He was so hungry. He told me terrible things. Absolutely terrifying things that he had been through. I was angry at myself for not going with him to protect him. Everything my mother did to me, became his problem. He stayed with my for a few months after we got home. I wanted him to have a stable home. I called our Grandfather and ask him if he would take Lane in and make sure he got everything he needed. I was 18, just graduated, making minimum wage at 24 hours a week. I couldn't give him what he deserved. He lived there for a year. He became very close with our Aunt and Uncle over the year. He then proceeded to move there for the rest of his school years. I am now extremely proud to say that he graduated high school and boot camp. He is now a proud service member of the United States National Guard. I'm a very proud sister. ❤️🇺🇸

I definitely wasn't prepared to add this update.

A year has gone by and I've heard nothing of my mother. Which is always a good thing. Except for today. Today I received of phone call from a cousin letting me know my uncle (my mother's brother) had passed away. He was a drug addicted alcoholic who lived on the streets. I'd only met him a few times. However, that's not why she called. She called to let me know she was informed of this by my mother's sister. Apparently my mother has been staying with her sister. Whom only lives 4 hours from me. I absolutely fear for mine and my babies lives.

Why would I fear for my life and my babies lives? I wouldn't put it past her to try to hurt us, or worse. She attempted to kill me twice when I was a kid. Once when I was 4 years old. She came at me with a knife. Luckily I saw her coming and took off running. I ran through the house as fast as my legs could take me.

We lived in a very small house that circled back around itself. From living room you could get straight to the kitchen or go down a long hallway and end up in a bathroom, bedroom or around back to the kitchen. I ran through the hallway in hopes she would follow me. If she did, I could go through the kitchen again and out the front door that she was initially blocking. She started to chase after me, but stopped short and ambushed me as I entered the kitchen. I quickly turned, but not quick enough. She cut clean from my fore arm up to my shoulder in one stiff motion. I remember the searing pain. I wanted to fall to my knees from the pain. Even then, I knew if I did, I would surely die. I ran so hard I made it out the door. I saw my father's car pulling down the road. She reached the door and yelled out "if you tell him I will kill you and your brother, his death will be on you." I didn't tell. I told know one. What was my mom's excuse for my giant gash? The cat, the neighbor cat to be exact. We didn't own a cat.

Plus a photo of me with makeup to prove I have eyebrows and eyelashes. They're just blonde 😂💛

2 weeks tell I’m due

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