First herpes outbreak

Wow I can’t even figure out how I’m feeling right now. I don’t know if I’m sad or mad or what but I’m super bummed. Been having irritated skin for the last few days and saw some bumps today so I went in and the dr confirmed what I didn’t want to hear. Going to pick up my medicine now... haven’t told the boyfriend yet but the dr said it most likely came from him. Am I wrong to feel sort of mad at him that he gave it to me? Now this is something I’ll have to live with my whole life. Those of you that have it, do you wait until you have an outbreak to take meds or do you take the daily preventative ones? Is it even worth going back to using condoms now since obviously we both have it? I’m just trying to unscramble all these thoughts in my head, please give any advice or support you can I feel kinda lost..