I have no title.

I hate being a mother, I hate being a wife. I hate my life. I want to run away. could be stress making me feel this way. I just don't know what to do. I can't take it anymore. My husband just doesn't understand.

Living situation....we have our own apartment, we have a roommate. He has a dog. The whole apartment smells like this nasty ass wet dog smell. He doesn't clean up after himself often and he keeps using my husbands things because he is broke. We're just as broke!! Rules were pick up after yourself and keep common areas clean. Leave everyone's shit alone. I didn't choose to live here, my husband made the decision. 4 more months, than we can move but I seriously can't wait. I get angry as soon as I realize I am headed back to this hell hole.

Baby is napping, brother in law thinks it's a good fucking idea to start being noisy as shit! Wakes up the baby. Every parent knows what happens when a child doesn't get a proper fucking nap! I have to deal with it!

I can't leave my daughters bottle rack out because my BIL thinks it's okay to set his greasy ass glasses on it! I cant have anything of mine out without it being tempered with.

My marriage? I feel stuck with him. We don't love each other. We act as roommates. I have tried and tried to get us reconnected. He says he has tried as well. I have no where to go and I wont leave my daughter alone at his families hands. Babysitting. I have my reasons.

I'm pregnant. Again. Don't want it. Didn't expect it. The husband wants it. I feel forced to keep it. Forced to go through this.

I don't have friends. I have 2 family members. I can't go to them. I don't want to be their burden or for them to see my life is falling apart.

*****All this unhappiness can be causing me to want to divorce my husband because I still feel like I need him. When he is here, I want to be by his side. I dont understand why. Most days I want to leave him. Leave this place. Leave my daughter. I can't get a job. I'm disabled. Going through the SSI process. I'm scared to abort or to set this child for adoption. Husband says he will never forgive me if I abort, he wont pay for it. Adoption, he wont talk about it. Doesn't want anyone else raising his child.