Confused and lost

Hey ladies(and the men who are on here) so I’m having a hard enough month and my other is making me feel very vulnerable and upset right now and I wanna make sure I’m not over reacting because my emotions have been up due to two close and recent family members passing, along with I have a toddler and been the one paying bills the last two months(not the problem just added stress to the recent passings) so last June my other attempted to cheat and told on himself because he felt dumb because the female took his money and left. He was gonna pay to get head from some random female. Well aside from all that because I have too big of a heart and ptsd from my past to break up my family when I came from a horrible broken home. Anyway as months have gone by and everything he’s had a instagram and Facebook(signed in on my phone as well) as well as he’s been caught watching porn(found on his history, I have no problem with, just the fact of him hiding it I have self image problems due to a eating problem that’s like anorexia drs aren’t sure what’s wrong I can’t gain weight or eat most days my son is a miracle due to how little I eat as well as it’s hard for me to try and conceive now) but Iv also caught him talking to females and liking pics of half naked girls and just a lot of things that lead to cheating. I’m not one to hold someone down Iv told him he can go live his life and when he’s ready to be a part of my family I want he can man up(or course get tested) and we can work on things, but he says he loves me wants to get married etc. I deleted his Instagram app it kept tempting me to look and upsetting me and what I would find. But now he’s finally listened to when I said I left the account alone but just deleted app and so he wants to make another one..........I just don’t know how I feel on that, I check his location at least once when he leaves without me...I am not like this and don’t like being like this...I’m one for privacy and just being open minded but that’s also killing me because he’s already tried once....I can’t even think straight right now and I’m glad my sons at my parents because of it...I just don’t know what to do, message me comment anything please I can’t keep feeling this way 😣💔