So I have been raped 3 times. In a 3 year time frame from 18 years old to almost 21 years old. I have had no one to talk about it. I think my mom was raped because when I talked to her about it she didn't say anything and I had to keep talking because I couldn't do the silence. my dad was never there. my mom was but only physically. so now at 21 years old I am frustrated because I have bottled all of this up and now my ptsd is coming out hard. This guy I have been seeing he came when we were having sex but it hit my the bottom of my face and when I was raped for the first time he held me down after it all and came all over my face. so when it hit my face I automatically started crying and actually felted like I was being held down. And it was horrible. what do I do if there is no one to talk about it. and trust me there is no one. I can't pay for a therapist at the moment. But if anyone is going through the same thing I need help. It's getting worse. Most of my dreams include nightmares that aren't nice and feel really real.