A farewell letter to my fiancé..

Dear ex,

When I met you, I was at a very difficult place in my life. You were there to keep my head afloat, and save me from all of my troubles that were threatening to swallow me whole. You restored my strength and my faith in myself, and for that, I will always be grateful. When I met you, I didn't think anyone could be so perfect. Nobody could make me laugh as hard, or smile quite as big. You quickly became my favorite late night driver, movie cuddle partner, and good morning kisser. You took up a place in my heart in home that I truly thought I would never regret opening up to you. When I met you, I never thought you would break me the way you did. I never anticipated your hand wrapping around my throat as you pinned me into the wall to scream in my face. I never expected your response to my HG and cervical cancer diagnosis to be "what's for dinner". What I really never expected, was for you to leave me to cope with my pregnancy related illness, while working 40+ hours a week to pay for our house and attending school full time, all alone. I tried to leave you. I tried to walk away so many times. But your manipulative messages, your threatening texts.. they always brought me back. But this time, this is goodbye. Goodbye to all the nights we spent, curled up on the couch. Goodbye to singing to the radio at the top of our lungs. Goodbye to morning kisses and late night hugs. Goodbye to all the narcissistic comments you made. Goodbye to the manipulation, the fear, and the constant need to walk on eggshells. Goodbye to what I once thought would be the final chapter in my life. Tonight, I will pray that the next one will be better.

Love,

Me