Don't feel anything?

Okay, so I've recently started to try masturbating- honestly, it's mostly because of a social stigma but ya know that's a whole other ordeal. That's kind of unimportant.

I've tried masturbating twice, both times in my shower. Both times I have tried rubbing my clit and fingering myself. My body sort of shakes and trembles when I rub my clit but I literally don't feel anything. It doesn't feel good at all, it's just sort of uncomfortable. It's not that to bad, but it's definitely not good or anything like other ladies talk about on here when they masturbate.

I'm confused and questioning things. I'm asexual and I've been on birth control for 5 years but I don't feel like either of those should have an effect on what my body should be feeling, ya know?

I'm just very very confused on what it should feel like? I really am not getting any pleasure from doing it.

Really the only reason I've started to try to masturbate because I have a boyfriend with a sex drive and I feel like I should sort of understand his perspective so I can relate to him more but I really don't.. Want to? Or like it. I know that isn't a good reason, but it is the way it is.

Any help or advice would be helpful!

Also, please don't judge me on my sexuality and I will not be getting off of birth control ANY time soon so that shouldn't be brought up as a suggestion either.

Thank you :)