I'm starting to lose Love and Respect😥

This is my family..MINES! I feel the need to stress that because lately I've been getting a lot of chatter about MY FAMILY. I'm 26 and he is 43 we are going on 3yrs and tie the knot on 08*18*18(the date of infinity)🖤! We have 2.5 kids together 4y9m and a 9mn old finally I'm due this Dec. (On his mother's birthday who is deceased) and I'm truly praying and feeling this is our girl I was right on both boys🤷🏿. But the chatter is about you coming to church and not married..'Shacking Up' ..and just gossip. Then my mom is so unsupportive I went to my first ultrasound and we only saw a sac no baby ..nothing I went alone and was discombobulated the rest of the day ...week later my mom is telling me about how some girl in the Church maybe pregs again (gossipping ugh🤦🏿) . I said well ma I can't talk about anyone 'cause I may be in the same

boat. 🗣️🔊 You a damn fool ain't it you baby ain't even 1 and you think you pregnant. I stated I had a ultrasound but couldn't detect baby because hopefully it was just too early..(cuts me off)🗣️🔊 ain't shit growing in that sac or whatever you saw God wouldn't allow that yo happen to you right now damn what you want a house full of fucking kids? How dumb could you be?.. I leave saying God will never put more on you than you can bare.. remember that! The closer my wedding get the more disagreements seem to show. I'm like not you too and I honestly don't have a 1 friend I can call mine. Since everything been going on I've lost my happiness for this baby and I feel bad. I want to connect but I'm too depressed.. hurt..tired..#BROKEN...oh my man is not in the clear at all I don't even feel we are on the same page at times.. I keep pushing! But I feel like if we don't figure us out soon ( I broke down and asked for counseling) it's going to be me and my kids ONLY !!

***vent over***