Boyfriend is so selfish sometimes. Am i overreacting?

My boyfriend and I have been together for 3 years. I’m pregnant with our first child. We’re happy. We love each other and he’s a good person and a good boyfriend (I need to make that clear) BUT sometimes he’s really selfish and I think he doesn’t realize it.

When we first met, he was just starting his company. I quickly realized that he didn’t have any money and was in a lot of debts. But, he kept telling me that In a couple months everything would fall into place, his company would start making money and he’d reimburse his debts. It’s been three years. He’s trying very hard, things are getting better but he’s still far from being free of his debts.

On my part, I make double his salary. Not because I come from money, on the contrary. I’ve just worked very hard to be where I am and I’m diligent with my money.

Because of that, I pay a lot more than him in the house. For example, we had to change our windows this spring so I paid the 4000$ on my own. And I’m ok with that. I make sure to never make him feel bad about it. I think it’s just normal that I pay more than him because I have a better salary. But I’m not rich. I could really use his help but I’m doing fine because I’m wise with my money and i try to save a lot.

Last novembre I borrowed 18 000$ to the bank so he could reimburse his debts that were getting out of hand. Now he’s reimbursing me every month. I wasn’t very happy about it. But I decided to do it otherwise he would have gone bankrupt.

My boyfriend is a dreamer. He’s always making plans for the future like travel to Japan or go on a road trip in California. I’m patiently waiting for him to get his s*** together so that we can make REAL plans together. But I’m not a fool. I’ve realized a long time ago that we’ll probably never do those things. And I can live with that.

This summer we’re supposed to go visit his family in France and then travel in the south of France just the two of us for a little vacation before we become parents in November. But three days ago he told me he’s not sure it’s a good idea anymore because of money. So I told him just pay for your ticket (he’s going in France anyway to see his family) and I’ll pay for housing if I have to because I really wanna do this.

Now yesterday, he tells me a few of his buddies are heading south (like in Cuba or Mexico) next October because they wanna do a trip together before they all become daddies. It would cost approximately 800$. And he’s asking me, if he has enough money then, can I give him my benediction to go?

I just flipped. It was late and I was tired so I said no and I went to bed. But I’m super angry. I can’t believe he’s telling me that if he finally has money he’s gonna use it for a trip with his friends. Not for a trip with me and not to help pay the bills.

I’ve never went on vacation with my boyfriend because he never has money. Next year, when I’ll be on maternal leave I’ll make less than half of what I make right now but I know I won’t be able to lean on him so I’m saving lots of money right now.

I dream of going on vacation with him and our baby next year but I didn’t tell him because I knew it wasn’t realistic to think he’d have the money to go. And now he’s telling me he wants to go with his friends.

I think he just doesn’t realize how hurting this is to me.

Am i overreacting? I wanna have your opinion please. I’m pregnant and really hormonal so maybe I’m not seing clearly.

Sorry for the looooong message and thank you so much if you read the whole thing.

One last thing: I just want to say my boyfriend pays half the mortgage with me + heating and internet. He’s always paid what he had to pay. But I deal with the rest (the car, coownership fees, taxes, insurance, and everything extra like repairs)

Please tell me what to do. I’m so angry and sad.