Mom mocking me for being a virgin.

So I'm 30 years old and yeah I'm still a virgin. Anyway I was talking to my mom about going to the Obgyn for the first time and I asked her if it was going to hurt or not. She said it wasn't going to hurt and that I was stupid and annoying her. Sorry it was only a question. Uhhh. I then proceeded to say I'm just a bit nervous and then she says in a rude way" you should know what something more thicker feels like in there. And I'm like "excuse me" and she goes "yeah you should know what what something bigger feels like"

I just look at her in shock them ahead proceeds to say "yeah your grown you should be doing more out there regarding my non sex life" I told her that "I can't believe that you as my mother would say something like that to me". Ahead then starts yelling at me and being really rude as usual. She was talking about my soul saying really hurtful things and then she said " if I saw the future I would have aborted you the first change I got" at that point I just got really quiet.. I mean what can. you really say to that. I then left and here I am now. She alwaya tries to put me down and me feel bad. I Just don't understand how you can be that cruel and think its okay. Some advice would be great thanks.