our story

so I dont have many friends and i just want to tell our story to someone.

we first meet when I was 16 and he was just almost 18. we decided to date lol. he was this tall chubby boy in a pink shirt singing and dancing to the song my humps by the black eyed peas. we fooled around on my cousins bedroom floor. no sex because id never had sex before. unfortunately my mother made me come home from my aunts wherw I wanted to live and we lost contact.a year went by, and while spending time with my older brother I seen him again. I was now 17 and I never forgot him, he remembered me. we started chatting over MySpace. he was now off in college in Ohio. we lost contact again. I got pregnant at 17 the very first time i had sex. when my son was 10 months old the state took him away because of my parents. I faught for over 2 years to get him back. I moved into my aunts home and there he was. this same tall chubby boy, who remembered me. I got my son back, and couldnt be more happy with my life. my son is my whole world! here I am now 20 and this man shows back up. we started dating, and next thing I knew 3 years had gone bye. we were engaged, buying our own home when things got fishy. he was hiding his phone, and acting strange. one day his sister came over and decided she wanted her nephew for a night. I was so excited because we never got to go out. I called him on his break to tell him. his reaction was well I'm going to my Best friends house to party you can do whatever the fuck you want to do. thats when I knew something was up. so I logged into his phone account on boost and looked at the call and text log. and hed been converating with this number I didnt know non stop for a week. I called it and it was some girl. I showed up at his work and she was in our car. she was an 18 year old temp worker. I lost it. I just lost it, I yelled cried and screamed. then left. 4 days later he called me. I came home,to him. and his dad in the yard in chairs. his dad sat us down and talked. he bawled his eyes out begging me not to leave. so I stayed. a week later he was acting strange again. so I got on boost. and he was taking to her again. I took all the strength I had in me and left him. after a year of no contact he got ahold of me.

asked me to come talk. so I did. because i never got closure. and he bawled his eyes out. the girl had cheated on him for months with multiple men. he apologized to me. said nothing physically happened with them while we were together but he knew what he did do was wrong. i finally got my closer. but I was just starting to talk to someone for the first time since him. he said he wanted his family back. said hed do anything. I told him to make sure thats what he wanted. he stopped talking to me for 2 weeks by then me n the other guy was dating. I told him he was to late. over the next 2 years we became best friends. the man I was seeing was abusive controling a narcissist, and an alcoholic. after finding out he was constantly cheating on me the entire time. i left. for 2-3 weeks straight me n the man I'd loved since I was 16 got closer. went on dates. stayed the night together, and wanted to try again. but the ex called me from jail. bawling his eyes out begging me to come back. I needed to make sure i gave it my all before walking away... so I went back. it was the hardest thing ive done in my entite life. walking away from this man id loved since I was 16. but i had to make sure I gave my ex my all. well we got married 3 weeks after I came back. that lasted 9 months.... he was cheating. lying. everything he did before. so I left and for good this time. after almost a year the man I'd loved since I was 16 had become my best friend over the last 4-5 year's. asked me to be his girlfriend again. and I said yes. that was 12-26-16. and we are now engaged, 89 days away from our wedding and ttc. we have been through so much, I still beat myself up for walking away from him 4 years ago. it was the hardest and worst thing i have ever done. but now I get to say I'm marrying my best friend! 12 years of this never ending cycle of losing him has ended. hes the love of my life! and I dont think I could ever be happier than I am now. and to top it all off he is going to legally adopt my 9 year old! my son understands what that means and he's over the moon about it. my baby will have a real father a man who he can look up to. a man who truly loves him and has alwaya been there for him! to be able to say I am marring my best friend and the best thing to happen to my and my son is the best blessing. even after everything I did to him and all the messy things he has dealt with due to my past and my parents and me having a child with a horrible sperm donor he never gave up. he has always been there and I will never be able to show him just how much he means to me or how grateful I am for him. but I will spend the rest of my life, as his wife, and someday mother to his children telling him amd showing him the love and appreciation I have for him!