Miserable

So I've been spotting constantly for a week straight now because of my birth control. I understand that my body is getting used to the hormones, but after four months, this JUST started last week. Since starting, I've had decent sized blood clots (old blood), awful cramping and nausea, a migraine from Hell, terrible acne, and when I move to much (I have a job that requires me to move A LOT) I almost pass out and it makes me bleed more. I've also been experiencing sharp pains in my vagina, not cramps, but pains.

I can't even sleep at night. I've tried aleve, I've tried Advil, Advil PM, midol, extra strength midol, Tylenol, and ibuprofen. Nothing helps for longer than 30min-1hr max. I get extreme hot flashes and cold chills. I can't focus half the time. I'm way more moodier than normal. I feel more depressed and stressed and anxious.

I'm miserable. I switched pills four months ago because after a year of being on the same type, they started making me feel this exact way. Now after four months, I feel this way again. My gynecologist thinks I'm allergic to I believe she said the estrogen in the pills. I just want it to stop. If I forget to take a pill one night and don't remember until the next night I feel SO much better. Hardly cramping and spotting and I feel somewhat like myself.

I want it to stop. And the funny thing is that I'm only on birth control for my awful periods. My periods started to become a little irregular and then they began getting heavier to the point I would pass out. I would feel so nauseated that I couldn't stand the thought of just drinking plain water. I would pass out. I bled too much. But here I am. Still suffering. And this spotting is four weeks before my actual period. I just don't know what to do anymore. Nothing helps. I've tried more natural substitutions, but they haven't helped either.

I want a hysterectomy so bad. I know that the next type of birth control I try will be the copper IUD and I don't like the thought of losing my period or having unusually long ones. But I'm too young for a hysterectomy, I'm only 19. I know it's for the doctors to save their butts if I ever decide I want kids in the future, but call me selfish, I care more about living comfortably than having a biological family. I can't keep doing this. I'm a full time student AND I work full time. Sometimes I have to call in because I feel like I can't move or my head hurts so bad I can't open my eyes. I've tried migraine medicines, but even prescribed doesn't help them because they're just hormonal and possibly an allergic reaction.

This is just a rant. I feel trapped in my own body. I'm so miserable. I can't enjoy myself anymore.