Feeling sad about being induced tomorrow

I’m being induced tomorrow when I will be 40+2. I have terrible white coat syndrome so my bp is always elevated at the ob office, so they think I have gestational hypertension. I test at home and am not high at all, and have had like 5 ultrasounds this pregnancy and everything looks perfect. So I am just kind of sad that I can’t just wait til I go into labor on my own; this could be my only pregnancy ever and I’ve dreamt of the experience of childbirth for a very long time. Just having a hard time seeing it end so differently than I always imagined.