⚠️ TRIGGER WARNING!

When I was 10 years old I was playing in a abandoned house which us neighborhood kids considered our club house. I remember I had gotten off the bus and went straight there waiting for all the other kids so we could ride four wheelers so I’m sitting on the floor looking at magazines that the people had left that lived there when I hear the back door open and close and Brandon walks in who is my sort of cousin (his grandfather is my moms half brother but Brandon was rarely around because he didn’t live in our neighborhood) I don’t remember what all was said up until he picks up one of the magazines and says she’s hot and is looking through the pictures (he was 13) and was making noises I was a shy kid and wasn’t around him much at all so I remember not saying much at all for awhile until he all but tackled me to the ground and he was on top of me trying to hump on me at first and I was shocked and was saying stop and trying to get up I remember him LAUGHING and trying to get my jeans off and I start screaming stop get off of me he was too heavy for me to push off so I start trying to kick which makes him try to pin his legs on mine instantly hurting my thighs and next thing I know I have both my hands around his neck squeezing as hard as I could and he fell off of me and I jumped up screaming at him saying he was disgusting and a rapist (even though he hadn’t raped me i just kept screaming it!) he started to get up and I was running for the door leaving my backpack and all and he was right behind me screaming please don’t tell anyone please. I didn’t stop I kept running until I was home and I went straight to my mom and told her what had just happened and I started crying from the shock and coming down from the Adrenaline I remember I felt like I was burning up. All I remember my Mom saying was for me to stay inside the rest of the night and that made me cry more because I felt like I was getting punished for what someone else did, even though she was most likely protecting me. My sister went for my backpack. The next day I told all our neighborhood friends what Brandon tried to do and he stayed away! Thankfully. I went through depression for the first time after that, it replayed in my head and I would have nightmares. I started sleeping with my sister in her bed and that helped a lot.

13 years later and it’s memorial weekend which was this last weekend my family has a cookout me and my husband of course go and we have a great night. We get to roasting marshmallows and the nights winding down and my sister says I’m going to go hang out with my cousin awhile. I’m like what cousin.. she says Brandon. I’m like he’s not our cousin he tried to rape me. My mom pipes in that’s what you say but I don’t know anything about that his grandfather just died and he is our family. My sister adds that he was a kid and blah blah. My husband saw my face turning red and instantly wanted us to go but I told them that’s messed up I don’t care that it happened when we was kids we was old enough to know what sex was and rape and he knew what he did was wrong or he wouldn’t of begged me not to tell. Later my husband told me that anytime over the years that he has known me if Brandon got brought up my mom and sister dismissed the assault and didn’t believe me anytime I mentioned it when they would say his name. Which mostly would be like Brandon is back in jail for battery and possession and i would say well if he can try to rape me I’m not really surprised. I don’t know why it has bothered me so much to learn they don’t believe me and never have like if I was going to lie about it wouldn’t I say he did rape me ? I’m so confused and hurt by them right now.